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Tuesday, February 07 2012 @ 07:54 PM SAST

Funny Stuph

...you mow your lawn and you find three cars you didn`t know you had...
...You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree...

Are you a Redneck ?

Read on to find out....

  • You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
  • Your property has been mistaken for a recycling center.
  • Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
  • You burn your yard rather than mow it.
  • You think the Nutcracker is something you do off the high dive.
  • The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
  • You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
  • You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.
  • You come back from the dump with more than you took.
  • You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
  • Your grandmother has "Ammo" on her Christmas list.
  • You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
  • You've bathed with flea and tick soap.
  • You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
  • You have used a rag for a gas cap.
  • Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does.
  • You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
  • You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.
  • Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
  • You have a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say Cool Whip on the side.
  • You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
  • You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.
  • Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home.
  • You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.
  • You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
  • You think the Nutcracker is something you did off the high board diving.
  • Your entire family sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
  • You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
  • Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
  • You've been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
  • You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
  • Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.
  • You think a hot tub is a stolen indoor plumbing fixture.
  • You took a fishing pole to Sea World.
  • You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
  • Your father executes the "Pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.
  • You can spit without opening your mouth.
  • You sit on your roof at Christmas time hoping to fill your deer quota.
  • The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
  • Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
  • You thought the Unabomber was a wrestler.
  • You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.
  • A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $10,000 worth of improvement.
  • You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65mph.
  • Somebody tells you that you've got something in your teeth and you take them out to see what it is.
  • You've ever been accused of lying through your tooth.
  • You know you`re a Redneck when.... | 1 comments | Create New Account
    The following comments are owned by whomever posted them. This site is not responsible for what they say.
    You know you`re a Redneck when....
    Authored by: Sparafucil on Wednesday, February 08 2006 @ 04:19 PM SAST
    from a distance dosent that picture resemble phil?

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